Keeper of the Babies

Why do we not treat babies with the respect they deserve? Why do we fail to admit that they are conscious, fully aware, fully feeling humans - conscious from conception forward ? Why do we not know this when we are planning for and carrying our children?

Has science convinced us that they are not conscious humans until they reach a certain gestational age or is it our collective consciousness? What if we were to treat our babies in utero as gently as we are supposed to when they are newborns? What if we chose to not put them into their sympathetic nervous systems while in utero by polluting their amniotic fluid with toxic thoughts and deeds? Why don't we consider that when we are flooded by adrenaline and cortisol that our babies are too? What if we were certain that their cells hold our traumas that we pass onto them? What if our unconscious thoughts became engrained in our babies while they still lived within us? What if we knew what our babies wanted? How do we become keepers of babies, guardians of birth? Keepers of the Babies in Mayan cultures ward off evil thoughts, deeds and environments and keep the child's soul intact.

Unpack your baggage, people. Don't leave it for your children. Don't overwhelm your children with your issues before they are born - dig deep and take responsibility for your actions. Educate yourself - really EDUCATE yourself and WAKE UP!!!!! Start with your pregnancy - don't subject yourself to toxic situations at work, at home, in your relationships. Take a good prenatal education class. Don't worry about what the epidural will do to relieve your pain - think about what your baby is going through with birth. Believe in yourself. IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU! Trust your body and trust your baby. Instead of buying the best layette and equipment possible, set up support for you, your husband and your baby by doing the best to understand what life as a new family is like. We need to tell each other the truth about parenting. We need to stop being narcissistic. You will sleep again one day. You will get your body back. You will socialize again. You need to connect with your baby by learning how to be emotionally present with them. It is much easier to nurture and love a child by connecting with them and being emotionally present than it is to heal a broken adult child. Take the time, WAKE UP, educate yourself properly, take ownership of your issues and parent with empathy. Your babies deserve it - they need you to be a keeper of the babies.

Some Women...

We, as a group, are much more critical of each other than men could ever be of us. I have learned and observed over the years that we are all doing the best that we can with what we have right now - to judge and be critical of one another is futile. Some women come into our lives and remind us of that, gently. I am fortunate to have beautifully strong, passionate powerful women around me every day. Two of them live with me. They are 17 and 19 and are as different from each other as night and day but is each in their own ways so very magical. My heart bursts with love and admiration for them. These two women love each other fiercely, push each other's buttons and are each other's biggest fan. I cannot tell you how many times over the years they have come to me and in rapturous terms described their love for their sister or how one can drive the other one crazy. They always have each other's backs.

Some women take our breath away. This morning I was privileged to spend time with a warm, open-hearted friend (and her amazing husband) that had her arms wide open to me when I walked in the door. Being in her presence is like an embrace - her heart energy and her love for her toddler daughters can bring me to tears. We have cried many times together - at the birth of her babies, when we share stories of our children and we have laughed so hard we cried. The fact that she loves my children too makes me love her even more.

Some women are our blood. There are only two other creatures that walk the earth with the same blood in their veins that I have, and as I have said before my bond with them is beyond this plane. Although we three are very different and we don't agree on everything, my sisters and I are bound to each other by our heartstrings - the blood is strong.

Some women break our hearts. They are the grade 5 girls that call us names, exclude us from friendships and leave us out. They write horrible things on bathroom walls, send us hate mail and undermine our power as we grow into adulthood. These girls never understand the depth of their damage, but if we are fortunate enough to have strong, passionate, HEALING women in our life, our capacity for empathy can extend to the broken lives of these bullies.

Some women heal our souls. They will pose in black bathtubs covered in bubbles for you. They will hold a camera in their hands and capture moments of ethereal wonder in the shape of a baby's smile for you. They will tell dirty jokes and not mind your constant references to gorgeous Scottish men. They will bring you food as your heart mends, birth their babies with their eyes locked on yours, kiss your forehead just to brand you as theirs with their new lipstick. These women don't mind if you lick caramel sauce off their face or ask them to sit through the latest vampire flick with you. These women will share with you that some days they want to get off the mummy bus.

Some women remind us that we need to play. They will haul us out of the house to go for a run at 6:30 a.m., tell us that we work too much and need a break and encourage us to move forward out of a job that is no longer serving us. They scream at the top of their lungs as we dive to save a ball from going in the net and tell us it's okay that we mis-kick. These women don't mind slapping us on the bum if we've done a good job, and quite honestly don't mind a slap back. They will share water bottles, half-time watermelon and the inside scoop on the best place to buy a great black dress. Drinking Guinness at 9:30 a.m. on a day that is not St. Patrick's day is absolutely fine with these women. Some women are all women... we need many women in our lives. Today, know that you are loved more than you can fathom, let the critical tone of your heart melt away, love the women in your life and what they have brought to you. Some women...

Chances Are...

Chances are you doubted yourself today. Chances are, you doubted your children today. Chances are, we would all be much more content, much more connected, much more authentic if we were able to trust ourselves and trust our children. Trust that we are able to meet their needs by connecting with them from the moment we wish to conceive them, trust our ability to birth them the way we are meant to birth them, trust our body's ability to make enough milk for them. As they grow, we need to trust that they are perfect, whole and here to teach us our biggest life lessons. Just be, just love, just grow. Trust that your parents were doing the best they could with what the tools they had at the time and trust your old hurts to heal because right now, right here, you are loved and you are meant to be TRUSTED. Chances are, if we trusted in our heart energy and let the love in, we would be overwhelmed by all the beauty and love around us. Free yourself by trusting and watch what comes back to you. Chances are you will find a different level of connection.